How Much Should One Sacrifice for the Planet?

You know how you can just tell something isn't going to go your way just from a certain feeling you get? It isn't any kind of science, nothing tangible, but still you know instinctively that it's not going to be good? Well that's how I felt when I decided, a.k.a. got railroaded into, hosting a green cleaning party for my neighbor Sally. You remember Sally, she's the one who cornered me in the grocery store not long ago like the Spanish Inquisition.

I was at home minding my own business when the phone rang. It was Sally on the other end telling me about her newest venture. "I've been experimenting with healthy cleaning products, and I found it's really very simple to make your own," she told me as if she'd just invented sliced bread. "Seeing as you are so into the green way of life, I knew you would want to support the sustainable community by hosting my first eco-cleaning seminar." Did she really think she was going to smooze me with such a transparent approach? "Um Sally, why don't you hold it at your own house? Doesn't that make more sense?" I asked naively. "Oh gosh no that wouldn't work," she said as if talking to a three year old. "Everyone knows the party must be held on neutral territory, and seeing as you are the neighborhood green queen, yours is the logical house to host."

I wanted to ask her who everyone was. It was an answer that had eluded me for decades, who was everyone? Everyone knows you can't wear white past labor day, and everyone knows this and everyone knows that. But just who was everyone? I guess I pondered my life's mystery too long because Sally took my silence as a, yes I'll host your stupid party. "Oh thank you friend," she gushed, "I'll email you the list of people I think you should invite along with the party schedule. I'll also send along some menu ideas of what I think you should serve. Of course we can work on that together." She reassured me. "What," I asked too stunned to have heard a word she'd said after thank you friend. I sat there trying to wrap my brain around what exactly it was I'd gotten myself into when she said, "I have to run now, there's so much to prepare for. Oh goodness..." I heard her say before the numbing sound of the dial tone awakened my instincts to hang up the phone.

I sat there with my mouth slightly open like a fish out of water, as if there wasn't enough air in the room. I can't say for certain but I just know this is not going to be good.